How Not to Get Stuck With the Bar Tab – Pay Up, MOFO

How Not to Get Stuck With the Bar Tab – Pay Up, MOFO

Let’s talk about a classic move people love pulling—the “accidental” bar tab ditch.

You know the scene. You’re out with friends, drinks are flowing, vibes are good. Then, as the night wraps up, people start disappearing:

  • “Be right back, just running to the bathroom.” (Gone for 30 minutes.)
  • “I’m heading out, I’ll Venmo you later.” (Never happens.)
  • “Oh, I thought we were splitting?” (After ordering half the damn menu.)

And before you know it, you’re sitting there holding the bill like a chump.

If this has happened to you, or worse, if you’re the one mysteriously vanishing when the tab comes—this post is for you. Here’s how to avoid getting stuck with the bar tab and make sure everyone pays their damn share.

1. Open Separate Tabs from the Start

This is the number one way to avoid getting screwed. If you’re drinking with people you don’t 100% trust to pay up, get your own tab.

It’s easy—just tell the bartender from the beginning:
“Hey, I’ll start my own tab.”

Boom. No drama, no chasing people down later.

2. If It’s a Shared Tab, Set the Rules Early

If the group is splitting the tab, don’t wait until last call to figure it out. Say something early on like:

  • “Are we splitting evenly or paying for what we order?”
  • “Let’s Venmo after each round so nobody forgets.”

This way, when it’s time to close, nobody is pulling the “Wait, I only had one drink” nonsense.

3. Cut Off the Moochers

Every group has that person—the one who conveniently “forgets” to pay, orders expensive drinks, then suddenly goes MIA when the bill comes. Don’t let it happen.

If you see someone ordering round after round but not pulling out their wallet, call it out:

  • “Hey, you grabbing the next round?”
  • “We’re all covering our own, right?”

No need to be aggressive—just make it clear that nobody is getting a free ride tonight.

4. Pre-Pay or Venmo As You Go

If you’re out with a sketchy crowd or don’t want to get caught up in the “I’ll pay you later” trap, pre-pay for your rounds.

  • Order a drink, close the tab.
  • Send the money to the group tab before things get out of control.
  • Make sure people Venmo as soon as they order their first drink.

No tracking people down, no BS.

5. Don’t Get Suckered into “I’ll Get the Next One”

This is a classic move: “You get this round, I’ll get the next.” Then that person “forgets” or conveniently leaves early.

If someone says this, make sure they actually do it. If they disappear? Well, send them to PayUpMOFO.com and tell them to settle up.

6. Make Sure the Bill Is Split Before People Leave

The worst feeling? Sitting at the bar realizing half the people are already gone, and now you’re stuck paying the entire bill.

Before anyone leaves, make sure their portion is covered.

  • Ask the bartender for a split check before closing out.
  • Make sure Venmo transactions are complete.
  • Keep track of who paid and who "forgot."

Because if someone “forgets” one too many times, maybe they don’t belong in the next round.

7. If You’re Stuck With It, Handle It Like a Boss

Sometimes, you just get screwed. If that happens, take notes on who bailed, remember their tab, and make sure they Pay Up, MOFO next time.

And if you’re tired of this happening? Just send them to PayUpMOFO.com and let them settle it the right way.

Bottom Line: Don’t Be the Sucker at the Bar

Going out should be fun—not a finance nightmare. If you’re always getting stuck with the bill, start setting rules upfront and making sure people pay what they owe.

Because at the end of the night, nobody likes the person who ditches the tab—but everyone respects the one who calls it out.

So be smart, keep your money in check, and when in doubt? Pay Up, MOFO.

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